


Here Again

by Xyriath



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: First time after dying fic, Fluff, M/M, Minor Angst, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-03
Updated: 2014-02-03
Packaged: 2018-01-11 00:30:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1166447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xyriath/pseuds/Xyriath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim's alive.  All the medical tests in the world can tell Leonard that.  Sometimes, though, he needs reminding anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Here Again

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Admiral](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Admiral/gifts).



Jim was cold when Leonard touched him.

Not so cold as he was before, when he was lying there, on the table, skin pale and clammy and wrong. Now, there was still a level of warmth, of movement, of that tense, coiled energy of life that defined Jim Kirk. When he took Jim's hand. When Jim rested his head on Leo's forearm. Leo often found himself resting his fingers on that spot on the back of Jim's neck, right near where it met his right shoulder, and running his thumb gently across the collarbone.

But before, Jim had radiated heat the same way he had radiated that energy, that light. And, while Leonard had a slight amount of difficulty finding any sort of precedence for side effects of resurrection or blood transfusions from superhumans, it wasn't difficult to make the logical conclusion.

He tried, he did, to keep the worried crease between his eyebrows from deepening whenever he touched Jim. He had serious doubts that Jim would actually notice, but the last thing Jim needed to see was Leonard concerned expression during medical tests, since that concern had almost nothing to do with his recovery, really.

But it meant that Leonard had to keep checking, had to keep reassuring himself that it was normal, that Jim was all right. It meant that he kept finding excuses, both medical and otherwise, to have his hands somewhere on Jim's bare skin.

Somewhere he could feel a pulse was preferable.

When Jim got up and tried to walk again for the first time after his resurrection, Leonard kept one hand on his waist and the other around Jim's wrist. As he improved, Jim needed less and less support, but Leo refused to let go until he could fully walk on his own.

The day Jim was cleared to go home with him, Leonard held him for a long time, buried his face in Jim's neck and breathed him in. Jim let him, arms wrapped around Leo's waist, and Leo could almost sense the tolerant amusement on his face.

"I'm glad we're leavin'."

"You're glad." The laugh is familiar, if weaker than usual, with a rasp that he isn't used to. "You haven't been stuck in one of those beds for weeks." He squeezed as Bones inhaled again, taking a deep breath. Jim smelled like antiseptic and hospital bed, and Bones wanted to scrub every trace of it off him.

After they got home, he didn't get the chance to do much else before Jim fell asleep in their bed.

Hell, Jim didn't do much else besides sleep for the next week. He did it for both of them, in fact: Leonard got an opportunity to use the mental alarm clock he had perfected back in med school, never sleeping too deeply, and never for more than a few hours at a time. He had been a doctor too long. Too much could happen over the course of a whole night, no matter how much better Jim might have been appearing to get. Jim woke up every morning with a grin in Bones's direction. Bones woke up every few hours, ensured himself that Jim was breathing, was fine. And he always was.

Until he wasn't.

Leonard knew something was wrong the moment he opened his eyes. The awkward sprawl of Jim's limbs wasn't one that anyone could find comfortable, even in sleep. His skin hadn't been this pale and clammy since Bones had seen him in that body bag. And with a quick glance at Jim's chest—

He wasn't breathing.

"Jim!"

The word was hoarse, cracked; too quiet. It was all too quiet. He tried again.

"Jim!"

Not any better; it was just a whisper. He shoved himself forward—or tried. His arms wouldn't move, only make a feeble twitch when they should have been holding Jim, taking his arm, feeling for a pulse. And Jim…

Jim just lay there, body twisted grotesquely. Bones could just stare. Helpless. Useless. He tried to wrench his shoulders out of the paralysis, but nothing would move. He needed to help, to move—do something¬—Jim was dying, again, and he couldn't do anything—it was his fault—

"Jim!"

This time the scream wrenched itself free of his throat as his shoulders managed to wrench themselves upwards. He twisted his head frantically, and his eyes settled on a sleepily blinking Jim, squinting up at him in the dim light.

"Bones? Whassa matter?"

After the few seconds of disorientation that come from waking up passed, Leonard let out a choked sob and reached out to grab Jim's arm, yanking him up and into an embrace. Jim's arms flailed about for a moment before settling on Leonard's back, and Leonard pressed him up against his chest.

He was still cold. Leonard could feel his heartbeat, but the temperature wasn't right. His hands seemed to be the only part of him that wasn't shaking as he frantically felt every inch of Jim he could reach before taking Jim's face in his hands and kissing him. He needed to know that he was alive, that he was okay.

Jim could either feel the shaking or the desperation in the kiss, because he slid his hands up, locking them around Leonard's neck and leaning in. Leonard felt him moving, and, a moment later, a pressure on his thighs where Jim was now sitting on his outstretched legs.

Jim's lips moved against his, tongues touching lightly, the smell of Jim enveloping him. But then it vanished, and Bones opened his eyes to see Jim's worried expression.

"You all right?"

Bones opened his mouth, closed it, swallowed, then nodded, thumbs skimming across Jim's cheeks. "I just—I still can't believe you're here."

Jim smiled at him, brilliant and sunny and warm enough to outshine anything else. "I guess I just have to keep reminding you, then."

He leaned in, kissing him again, deepening it. Leonard could feel himself moan, cracked and desperate, and he leaned forward, pushing Jim back. Jim resisted for a moment, stealing a few more seconds of breathless kissing, before grinning mischievously and flopping back obligingly, head missing the pillow due to the angle. After a moment, he hooked his legs around Bones' waist. Bones glanced from the pillow to Jim, shooting him a warning look, but Jim only grinned.

Leonard shook his head, gently hoisting Jim back onto his pillow to support his head before finally shifting to lay down on him.

He didn't say anything at first, just traced his fingers down Jim's face, kissing across his jaw and cheeks before leaving short, lingering touches on his lips. A small, displeased noise erupted from the back of Jim's throat, and he kissed back insistently. Bones couldn't resist a laugh. He kissed the corner of Jim's mouth, down his jawline, until he was far enough that he can bury his face in Jim's neck. He pressed a light kiss there, but then stopped, resting there, inhaling.

"Jim," he breathed, accent elongating the word into two syllables, almost slurring it. Damn, he hadn't been able to relax like this since that damned Khan fiasco.

"Bones," came the warm reply, steady and content. Jim's fingers ran through Bones's hair, and he could hear the smile in Jim's voice.

Slowly, he lifted his head, own lips curving up at Jim's expression. He leaned in to kiss him again, and jumped slightly when Jim's hands slid up the back of his shirt. He was fast and insistent on pulling it off, and when it had finally cleared Leo's head and been tossed aside, he looked down at Jim's face, frowning slightly.

"You sure you're up for—"

Jim's hands yanked his head down, and his lips cut off the question. It was a few more seconds before he let him go, lips barely touching Leo's as he whispered, "Christ, yes, fuck yes."

The rest of their clothing wasted no time in going the same way as Bones's shirt. The lube was where it had always been, in the drawer beside the bed, and Jim's legs wrapped around Bones's waist again as soon as they were able, tugging him closer.

Leonard offered little resistance, enjoying the pure, simple pleasure of touch and the intimacy it brought: his chest pressed against Jim's, their lips, their hips, their cocks—

And damn if both of them weren't hard already, almost desperately so. Leonard rolled his hips, rutting into Jim, the precome slicking their cocks and intensifying the pleasure. For a moment he debated reaching between and grabbing them, but that would require taking his hand out of Jim's hair, and the thought of allowing even an inch of space between them at this moment was one he shoves away very quickly. Instead, he focused on pressing his lips everywhere he can reach as Jim returned the favor, the two of them grinding and frotting desperately into each other. Leonard lost himself in the pure physical sensation, not thinking, not doing anything except focusing on the man beneath him and matching his movements, over and over and over.

It's when Jim began to make a keening noise that Leonard managed to still his hips and pull away. The noise turned into a full-fledged protesting one, but before Jim could turn it into words, Leonard was kissing him gently again.

"Shhh. Shhh, darlin'. It'll be okay. I ain't leavin'."

The reproachful look Jim shot in his direction was almost enough to make him reconsider, but the way Jim's eyes widened when he heard the cap on the lube open only steadied his resolve.

And hey, it wasn't easy to say no to those eyes.

It had been a while since they'd done this, and before that it had been a longish string of Bones on the bottom, so to say that the next few minutes were free from awkward positions and limb flailing would have been a lie. Eventually, however, Leonard knelt between Jim's spread legs, eyes hungrily taking in the sight before him as Jim writhed beneath him at every crook of his fingers. And the way the flush had spread across his face, down his chest, and onto his cock had Leonard wondering if he even wanted to stop.

Until—

"Bones, please!" The desperation cracked Jim's voice, and those brilliant eyes were fixed on Leonard's. There was only so much anyone, even the infamous Doctor McCoy, could resist them.

Pulling his fingers out of Jim and giving them a quick wipe on the sheets, he grasped his cock, stroking it twice before leaning in and pressing gently into Jim.

"Bone—!"

The cry cut off with a choked gasp as Leonard buried himself inside Jim. He could feel Jim's legs trying to wrap around him again, and he allowed himself to be tugged down until he was lying on top of Jim. Jim reached for him, taking his face and kissing him fiercely, and Leonard returned it with all of the pent up fear and relief and ardor that had been plaguing him for weeks.

"Christ, kid—"

It's all he could get out before Jim kissed him again, Jim's arms locked around Leonard's back, Leonard's hands running down from Jim's hair to his arms to his waist and everywhere in between. He rolled his hips, thrusting into Jim, felt the muscles tensing and working under his hands and on his back and around his cock and he just wanted more, wanted to have his hands and his mouth over every inch of Jim, every inch that's there and fine and his.

The doctor side of him managed to remind every other part of him that he needed to go easy on Jim, so he was able to set a less demanding, if steady enough, pace as he thrust. From the obscene noises tearing their way free from Jim's throat, Leonard figured he didn't object much. He lowered his hand to squeeze an ass, slid it up a set of ribs, tangled his fingers in Jim's and pinned the hand to the bed, marveling in the feel of all of it, working and moving and perfect.

Leonard knew this wasn't going to take long, had known it when they had started, but christ if it wasn't the most amazing damn thing in a long, long time. He could feel himself close to coming, and knew that with the way Jim was breathing, he wasn't the only one. For a moment, he nearly reached between them to give Jim a helping hand, but he didn't want to let go, and the kid probably didn't need it anyway.

Leo came first, gasping and burying his face into Jim's neck as the pleasure surged through him. Jim's legs were shaking around him as Leonard continued his rhythm, getting closer and—

Jim tilted his head back and tensed, yelling as he bucked his hips into Bones. Bones could feel the sticky warmth hit his stomach, and stilled after one last thrust, pressing his lips against Jim's in a desperate, possessive kiss.

They lay there for a few minutes, eventually breaking the kiss and resting their foreheads together instead, eyes closed. When Jim started to squirm a bit, Leonard moved back, sliding out and rolling off to the side, opening his eyes to watch him intently.

"You feelin' okay, kid?"

Jim cracked an eye open before that grin spread across his face. "Yeah. Great. Damn, Bones." He closed the eye, sighing and letting out that little soft grunt he made whenever he was especially tired. Leonard tried not to think of how many times he had heard it in the hospital room.

He reached out to tug Jim closer. Jim folded into him obligingly, but squinted upwards.

"You know, I am all right. Good sex, no matter how great, isn't going to kill me again."

"Shush," he grumbled, planting a kiss on his temple. Jim reached up to return it on Leonard's cheek.

"Been a while since you've really slept."

"I—"

"Well, now that you've seen I'm not only fine, but hardy enough to stand up to sex, will you try to sleep more than a few hours?"

Bones sighed, debating arguing, but the hand that had reached down and twined its fingers with his was making it hard to come up with anything decent.

A sigh. "I'll give it a shot, okay?"

No reply. Leonard glanced down. Jim was already asleep, face half-buried in Leo's chest.

For the first time in far too long, Leonard can feel himself really smile.


End file.
